Bonding with your Daughter Guide
- Getting through” to your daughter“
- Girls and assertiveness
- Talking about the media
- Understanding gender differences
- Encouraging good decisions
- Back to the Bonding with your Daughter Guide: Get more practical tips and fun ideas.
Talking to Daughters
Encouraging good decisions
Q. So how do I help my daughter make good decisions?
A. Parents can begin by answering questions very early. Let the girls find their adventure; we can be their resource. Each of us can follow our daughters through their experiences. Clarify choices made along the way–choices made by our daughters and choices made by others. Expecting our daughters to lead does not mean we always agree with their choices. If we support their right to communicate choices even when we disagree with them, our daughters will learn that they do not always need to be “right.” They can learn to trust themselves and others, bringing communication and action into balance.
Consequence from action must follow; we must be careful not to say—nonverbally or verbally!—“I told you so,” or “Too bad you did not listen to me.” Instead, we answer questions and offer comfort. We try not to show our daughters how to “correct” difficult situations so they can try their own solutions. We won't fight all their battles and we won't smooth all the bumps. We will communicate our support to our daughters as they learn connections between actions and consequences. With that support, they will develop insight into how to ask questions of themselves, a principle that will serve them long into their futures.
Get more tips on raising confident daughters in Girl Power: Building Confidence, Encouraging a Positive Body Image and What Parents Should know about Puberty.
